Weddings

The Nina, The Pinta, And…That Other One Nina didn’t ask to be a bridesmaid.

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There were three boats Columbus sailed – and they roll off the tongue as a group.  “The Nina, The Pinta, The Santa Maria.” We all know (or are part of) groups of girlfriends who are the same way.

So what happens when the trio is not kept whole in a wedding party? Everybody is wearing purple taffeta to the wedding except one gal, bless her heart.  And she likely feels left out.

bridesmaids Palm Springs wedding florist
Bridesmaids – all in a row. Photo by Jennifer Yount

A lot of etiquette books will say be sensitive blah blah blah and give the non bridesmaid friend a job handing out wedding bubbles.  So maybe the being sensitive part isn’t blah blah blah.  But it is more specific to your friend – you have to treat these situations individually.  Don’t just say “you’re really important to me” and shove a stack of programs in her hands.  The best solution of all? Call us biased, but flowers speak volumes.  Special friends not wearing “special” (and oh boy are some of them special) dresses are often thrilled to pieces to be honored with a corsage.  Nothing says you’re in the in-crowd at a wedding like official flowers.

So, Nina, get the Santa Maria a wristlet.  And keep sailing happily along.

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Workin’ 9 to 5 – At Something Other Than Planning Your Wedding

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my own office at work :-)
Remember - do some work at work!

What do you say when someone asks you what you do for a living? I’m guessing for 99% of you it’s not, “Oh I’m independently wealthy so I spend the work-week eating bon-bons and planning my wedding.” So that means there are brides in offices, retail establishments, and government jobs all over the country, brimming with news about your latest nuptial truimph or travail.  One word of advice:

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Guess what? Your co-workers are well aware you’re getting married. So is your boss. In this economy, we do not advise you to to keep reminding them that you’re really distracted by a big non-work project.  Surfing wedding websites during office hours is another way of pointing out that your focus is elsewhere for the next year or so.  And while that may be true, at least make an effort to show some enthusiasm for your work.

Take heart, little brides! One or two co-workers will want to live vicariously through you, and so inevitably dishing about flowers and dresses will occur.  But other than with Bridget in accounting, try to maintain the Separation of Work and Wedding.

Quick! Minimize the window! Here comes your manager!

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There’ll Be Sad Songs to Make You Cry. For the Love of Billy Ocean, Not at the Reception!

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A fellow planner friend relayed this recent recurring dream:

“I’m toddling happily around the cocktail hour holding the bride and grooms signature sloe gin fizz* and taking in the scene of a bustling reception getting off the ground.  The peppy Michael Bublé number tapers off and familiar slow piano chords kick in, filled with emotion.  Uh oh, It’s Billy Joel. My inner game of “name that tune” begins. Is it ‘Always a Woman?’  ‘And  So It Goes?’ Does it really matter? Let’s face it, Billy Joel, bless his heart, is the troubadour of the relationship train wreck.  Nightmare!”

Afraid of Billy Joel? Oh yes. A bummer song busting up your carefully orchestrated cocktail hour scene can really stick in the craw. Here’s the thing.  After the ceremony,  guests are on a high – they’ve just witnessed a glowing couple come floating back up a flower-bedecked aisle. If the wedding professionals have done our jobs we’ve created the atmosphere you dreamed up for your reception.  Flowers, food, drinks, lighting, music…it all combines to envelop a guest in your vision and keep that warm ‘what-an-amazing-couple’ buzz going.

So when all of a sudden the music devolves into a love gone wrong ballad, it’s like putting salt in a recipe instead of sugar.  The notes are pretty – but there’s just something off.  And off putting.  So leave those weepy tunes off the playlist.

Wedding tears are best kept for the ceremony, not for depressing cocktail hour music

A quote inspired  by Billy Ocean:  “There’ll be sad songs that will make you cry.  Love songs often do.  They can touch the heart of someone new and all that jazz – just let your DJ know you don’t want them played at the wedding.”

Need specifics for your Itunes jockey? Just feel like crying your eyes out? Check out this list.

As for our friend with the restless nights, maybe we’ll send her the MP3 of “Get Out of my Dreams (Get Into My Car).”

*note – boutique distillery gin is all the rage – start learning to talk snooty about juniper.

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