relationships

Breaking News! Kate Middleton is Not Having Twins In July!

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I gotta say, I’ve never imagined myself saying this, but I am really grateful that I am not the Princess of Wales. I can’t imagine my due date being worldwide breaking news.  I think that young newlyweds are under enough pressure as it is without throwing the international media into the mix.

Prince Harry and Kate Middleton at the Garter ...
Prince Harry and Kate Middleton at the Garter Procession (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

And that’s where I’m going with this, to hope I can talk people into tacking on one extra new year’s resolution for 2013, namely to leave the newlyweds in your lives alone about their baby plans.  In American culture, as soon as the last grain of rice hits the ground it’s the next topic of conversation.  When will they start a family? When will there be grandchildren? And when the newlyweds show up anywhere, they face an inevitable barrage of questions.  And frankly, when (and whether) to have children is a serious, intimate decision that they may not want to share at Easter dinner.  It can be terribly uncomfortable.

So think twice about your questions when your favorite couple returns from their honeymoon, and avoid the whole baby thing. Suggestions: ask them about their trip, ask them about the wedding.  Ask them if they know Kate Middleton is not having twins in July!

Be well, and love well.

-Dinah

Should Old Acquaintance Be Forgot?

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Nowruz 1387 / نوروز
Nowruz (Persian New Year) display (Photo credit: Ehsan Khakbaz)

 

After laying a big kiss on the first person handy, drunken revelers around the world will break into song tonight as their clocks ring in the New Year. The most popular tune, Auld Lang Syne, asks an important question in its very first line.  Should people who’ve walked in and out of your life, and experiences of the past be forgotten, and never thought of? The song has a simple answer – no – for old times sake, think kindly on your life- the highs and the lows, friends and the foes (oy vey, I’m writing my own song. Sorry about that).  At its core, Auld Lang Syne is a song about forgiveness. Through the year, we experience other new year’s celebrations in America.  And interestingly enough, they have a thread of forgiveness running through them too. Here are three:

  • The Lunar New Year celebrated by many Asian cultures. One Chinese tradition, according to Wikipedia, is to “reconcile, forget all grudges and sincerely wish peace and happiness for everyone.”
  • Rosh Hashanah he Jewish New Year, is a time for reconciling, and apologies.
  • NowRooz, the Persian New Year, includes among many traditions “sa’at- tahvil…a most crucial moment in the life of the family, especially with regard to forgiving past failings, putting away petty frictions that would otherwise fester into conflicts, and looking forward to more constructive relations.”

So when you put on your party hat tonight, and contemplate midnight, think about who you might want to forgive.  Oh yeah, and one more thing: think lip balm! Happy New Year everyone…

Live well and love well. And STAY SAFE.

Dinah

Waiting for a ring? Is he holding a box or a phone?

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I was chatting recently with my old friend Michael, who I hadn’t seen in a while, and told him I was writing a blog.  “Is it too technical, or would I be interested?” he asked.  I began to giggle. Why you ask? Because for all practical purposes, this is a wedding blog.  And Michael is not the marrying kind.  Now I’m not saying he’s gay, he’s dated women as long as I’ve known him.  He was even engaged once, but he couldn’t go through with it.  He’s just not cut out to function in the kind of arrangement that makes so many others so very happy.

I was delighted to hear yesterday that after all these years, he’d finally figured that out. He laughed too and shook his head – and basically said (out loud!) that he knew “it was never gonna happen.”  He knows he’s not meant to be married, and now he’s very upfront with anyone that comes into his life.

In this season of romantic jewelry store commercials pulling at the heartstrings of women across America, (see above for the kind that used to absolutely kill me as a single girl, and which will be EVERYWHERE until Valentine’s Day) I caution “someday brides” to tune in to their partners; make sure you’re not waiting for a ring from a guy who’ll never understand the way you love, and need to be loved in return.

Live well and love well.

-Dinah