Relationships

My Little Marital Advice Shop: Setting Yourself Up To Fail (cough – Kim Kardashian)

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Kim Kardashian at the 2009 Tribeca Film Festiv...
Mrs. Humphries

Yahoo’s OMG! big scoop today – Kim Kardashian Says Married Life So Far Has ‘Not Been Ideal’

I have three reactions.  From three perspectives.

1)  Perspective: Jewish Grandmother

Ideal? Who ever said anything about ideal? This is marriage sweetheart!  It takes work. And patience.  And matzoh ball soup.

2)  Perspective: Mine ( a year into a very happy marriage to a wonderful husband)

During wedding planning, don’t fall too deep into Ponies & Rainbows fairy-tale land.  They sweep up the rose petals, and suddenly there’s this thing called day-to-day life  If you’ve been obsessed with being the Princess Bride, the turning back into a pumpkin part is rough.

3) Perspective: your average fourth grader

Um, how does she expect things to be good? She’s making her new husband live with her sister, her baby, and the guy who’s the baby’s dad.  And they’re on TV.

Bottom line?  Know that life is never “ideal” to begin with, and you’re a hundred miles ahead of Kim Kardashian.

Hasta la blogsta-

Dinah

 

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Once Upon a Time, at the Dining Room Table…

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Photo of a dining room table piled with objects
Don't let clutter kill your fairy tale romance!

We dined, once, at our dining room table.  Then we got engaged. Suddenly piles of bridal magazines, boxes of invitations, and a flower girl basket took up residence.  Don’t let it happen to you.

“Why?” you may ask. “All that lovely flat space for storage.  Certainly a few months of dinner elsewhere won’t kill us.”  And you’re right – but it does, eventually, kill the romance in a relationship.  Normally romance doesn’t come easy, or cheap, but there is nothing so simple and special as to sit across from each other, light a few candles, and have a meal.  It doesn’t matter if you are eating frozen waffles on paper plates.  There’s something in the quality of the light that makes you both remember why you got engaged, married, pinned, whatever.

So watch one of those HGTV clutter busting shows, and keep that dining room table clear for some romance.  Sunday nights are perfect for a lovely dinner, but at the table – not in front of ABC’s promising new show…Once Upon a Time.

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A Reality TV Bride Tells All: why I said “yes.”

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When my then fiancé, and I announced that our wedding was going to be taped for a TLC reality show, people were more than a little surprised.  Everyone was convinced we were adding to an already stressful time.  In fact, saying “yes” to TLC was one of our best decisions. Let me tell you why.

The last weeks before the wedding were a whirlwind.  There was one oasis: shooting the show. Stephen and I spent two hours talking and “being cute” together.  We walked down a street near the beach hand in hand, trailed by a camera, giggling. We sat on a beautiful, sunny,  patio, reading to each other. We talked about how we fell in love.  That afternoon was a brief shelter from the crazy wedding planning storm: we got to reconnect, and remember that under the tulle and the tablecloths, was our unique love story.

The bride and groom, showcasing our use of succulents in a bridal bouquet and boutonniere
incidentally, showcasing our use of succulents in a bridal bouquet and boutonniere

I treasure those two hours, every moment.  The lights, the cameras, and the questions that reminded me why I had said “yes.”

Note – Credit where credit is due: I got, hands down, the most amazing hair and make-up team in Southern California.  Dana and her team from Design Visage in Orange County made me feel like a movie star. Thanks ladies!

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