Advice

What Martha Stewart Doesn’t Want You To Know: Wedding Advice Books Exposed

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I brought two wedding books to the store yesterday to add to our growing library. (Yes, My Little Flower Shop, top Palm Springs florist, is building a wedding book library)! Looking at books with our brides gives us a chance to prepare them for the inevitable moment of panic in the ‘Weddings” section at Barnes and Noble.

At any bookstore in America you’ll find glassy-eyed people in the wedding section, not knowing which way to turn. Seriously, it’s worse than the paper towel aisle at the grocery store. (What’s on sale? Is that the cheapo brand?  How may rolls in the pack? Are they Mega-Rolls?)

If you know what to expect, you won’t be discouraged by these experiences of book-overload.   So, knowing that the mountain of information you’ll face,  keep these tips in mind.

  • Wedding planning books are not required reading, and 99.9% of what’s in them probably doesn’t apply to you. (Are you inviting Norwegian royalty to your wedding? Didn’t think so).

    Reading Offbeat Bride
    Reading Offbeat Bride (Photo credit: Aron Meudt)
  •  Once you’ve got the books, (and this is the important part,) they do not need to be  followed obsessively to the letter. They are not written in stone. They were not given to us at Mount Sinai.
  • Books should be considered guidance, opinion and advice. From someone who doesn’t care if you ignore them.
  • How about looking in the library? If you find one you love, buy it. If not you’re not out $35.00 for a book you don’t need.

Bottom line? Talk to the vendors you’re working with! Their advice is the most valuable of all.  In terms of how they do weddings, and work with their clients, well, they wrote the book.

Be well, and love well.

-Dinah

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Gold Medal Wedding Advice

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Ah the Olympics.  Young smiling athletes performing at their best representing us all.  In a way, we see the best in our country as we watch the competitions in London.

But what else do we see?  We see hear a lot from commentators about “the Olympic Ideals”  which seem like things we all ought to live up to.  Respect, friendship, education, world peace…etc.  As a wedding professional, and drawing from my experience at a top Palm Springs florist, I see lessons brides can take from these young athletes and apply to their planning.  Here are three:

  • Have a Positive Attitude.  From the moment they stepped out onto the track for opening ceremonies, the athletes were thrilled. They were full of energy,confidence, and smiles! Thinking positive changes your outlook, and makes you a happier bride.  Through it all this is a celebration you’re planning! What fun, right?

    LONDON, ENGLAND - JULY 27: Fireworks explode o...
    LONDON, ENGLAND – JULY 27: Fireworks explode over the Olympic Stadium during the opening ceremony of the 2012 London Olympic Games on July 27, 2012 in London, England. (Image credit: Getty Images via @daylife)
  • Listen to your coach. The athletes (well, the smart ones, anyway,) know when it’s time to let someone else make a decision.  They have faith that they’re working with someone they trust to do what’s best for everyone involved.  This can be a hard one for brides, who frequently feel they need to direct every detail of their wedding.  Sometimes though, your vendor, or bridesmaid, or even (gasp) your mother knows better, so it’s important to listen, and learn to let go.
  • Live In The Moment. Listening to the athletes’ interviews, each one repeated that their overall Olympic experience was the most important thing to them. You could tell they were soaking in their time as Olympians, and relishing their time in London. Brides should keep that in mind.  Wedding planning can be a drag, for sure, but this is a time of your life that you’ll never get back.  Enjoy every minute.

Our Olympic athletes are kicking serious butt in London.  And it’s a delight to see the country rally around a group of bright, talented young people.  Be patient as you, or the bride in your life, move through the wedding planning process. In the end, everyone will rally to see you win something better than a gold medal: a happy married life.

Obama & Romney Down The Aisle? Preventing Political Family Run Ins At Your Wedding

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As if planning a wedding wasn’t stressful enough, brides getting married in 2012 have the challenge of the Presidential election.  Now I’m not speaking literally. We’ve decided as a nation to have elections on Tuesdays, which doesn’t interfere with many events. The divisive nature of American politics, however has many brides worried about, at best, uncomfortable conversations and at worst, disruptive and inappropriate behavior. Here are three tips from top Palm Springs florist My Little Flower Shop to avoid the worst case scenario.

Brides: Think ahead.  One advantage you have is a guest list, and RSVPs. You already know who the potential pot-stirrers are, so mitigate with calmer heads at their table.  You can also ask their family members to speak to them in advance about avoiding sensitive topics at your celebration. Make good use of placecards.

Wedding Party Member:  Congratulations, you’re an Interpersonal Diplomat. Bridesmaids and groomsmen have to add conversational negotiation to their list of duties. Do your part to find out who might be throwing bombs into a conversation and keep an ear out for friendly chats trending towards the election. Then redirect!  The best new topic? Try the honeymoon locale.  Has the political commentator ever been to Bali? No? What destinations are on their bucket list? Now you’re off and running.

Enlist your parents and siblings to keep politics out of your wedding celebration.

Wedding Guests: You know what they say. The conventional wisdom is that it’s a bad idea to talk about religion and politics among people you don’t know.  Good rule. You never know who’s sitting next to you.  You might have a great joke about Senator XYZ, but you might also be sitting next to his daughter.  Stay on your good behavior.  Don’t bait anyone, and don’t take the bait if someone’s trying to drag you into an exchange that could turn ugly.  The bride and groom will be grateful.

Politics don’t belong at a wedding.  Sharing that with family and friends should keep your celebtration a neutral zone.  If someone really acts up, drop them off at a local campaign office. Once they’re put to work when everyone else is at the family softball game, they’ll be back, and better behaved in no time.

Be well and love well

-Dinah