Planning your wedding? Or any special event? Good rule of thumb: Assume Nothing.
Really! Nothing. Always specify (in writing if possible) what you’ve planned for, asked for, paid for, hoped for and wished for.
Especially when it comes to hopes and wishes, please please please don’t expect partners, fiancées and vendors to read your minds. Much to my disappointment (what I wouldn’t give to see inside the minds of the Mother In Laws..) people do not acquire psychic powers during the wedding planning process. Here are some examples of assuming gone awry:
Don’t say to an honor attendant going to your wedding rehearsal: “I’ll see you there” and assume you actually will. In her mind (she’s the rowdy one) you’ll see her there…perhaps after the wedding, hung over from a night out clubbing.
Don’t say to your caterer: “I love beef, so just be creative” and assume you’ll get a lovely beef entreé, just like you imagined. Your caterer really is creative, and has always harbored a wedding planning fantasy: a reproduction of the Venus De Milo made out of steak tartare.
Don’t say to your brother, “Yes! Make a toast! Funny childhood stories and such” and then be surprised when he tells the guests about you stuffing your bra, or pretending to be ringmaster of the circus. At nineteen.
So you catch my drift. Assume nothing! Make it all very clear, and then enjoy the result of your very-well-communicated labors: just the wedding you wanted.
Be well and love well.