relationships

My best friends hate me! I just know it! (psst – actually, you don’t know it).

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To-be-weds can get worked up, and wedding party drama is a common occurrence. I like to point out that if you listen to your own words, you can often hear wisdom.

An example:

“My friends hate me, I just know it!” Let’s play that back. You “just know it?” Chances are you’re making assumptions. So a friend didn’t show up for lunch, and hasn’t returned your call. You have no idea of their circumstances– a sick parent, a dead car battery. Try not to jump immediately to “my best friends hate me.”

Friends don’t pitch in at weddings for free booze– they’re in it for the joy of helping you find happiness. So if it turns out someone is upset, they don’t hate you, they are just hurt by something you said or did.2013-stice.jpg

Your job as a good friend is to find out what happened and work it out. Approaching these situations with grace and humility while planning your wedding is not only good for smoothing things over in the immediate, but will also cement these important friendships for life.

Be well, and love well.

-Dinah

Tis the season for date night at the movies!

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Julie Benz at the Showtime Golden Globes Party...
Julie Benz at the Showtime Golden Globes Party, The Peninsula Hotel, Beverly Hills, Calif. – Jan. 11, 2009 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

It’s awards season! What does that mean for regular folks? If you’ve got a sweetie, put date night on the calendar, you crazy kids!  It’s time to go to the movies. Between us at MLFS we’ve got 50+ years of hard scientific data showing that seeing movies together is good for a relationship.

So, who picks the movie?  You’re bound to have divergent thoughts. The trick is you’ve got to indulge each other. Our friend Jim loved films like “The Notebook” and was an avid viewer of “Dawson’s Creek.”  When he got married, and our gift to them was a gift card to the Arclight Theatre, I made him promise he’d let his wife go see some cars blow up now and again.  Trade off between films that interest you both, and those that appeal strongly to one of you.  You’ll be surprised, I’ve ended up liking a lot of “International thrillers” that I went to reluctantly “for” Stephen.

Overall, be considerate and loving. Share popcorn, but buy your date his/her own coke.  Don’t believe the classic “oh I’ll only have a sip” line.  If you’re in one of the new theatres where the armrests move, push it up and snuggle close. Enjoy yourselves, but keep it clean, kids.

Live well, and love well.

Dinah

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Holiday Proposals!

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Did you know that a large number of engagements happen during the holidays? The majority happen between now and Valentine’s Day. I’m not sure which came first, the romantic holiday ideas or the jewelry industry push, but you will see diamond commercials galore, romantic comedies about girls getting engaged, it’s enough to make a girl waiting for a ring go out of her mind.

So what if your guy wants to wait until spring? (As mine did) well, all you can do is grit your teeth, and wait out the marketing blitz. And I recommend skipping the rom com – our year it was Amy Adams in Leap Year- my husband still has not forgiven me. Enjoy your courtship, and have faith. Diamonds will come when they will come.

Be well and love well.

-Dinah